Thursday, May 2, 2013

I let you see parts of me that weren't all that pretty

7 complete days of my first week of holiday--one word,boredom. Too much things happens in a row,one by one,and most of them are not my favor. I wish I could have a small room of apartment,with nothing in it rather than a bed and plenty of books. I wish I could spent all my day there whenever I don't feel like facing anyone I don't want to. 

These past days I've gotten myself into more selfish person. Its sick when I push people away whenever I felt dudgeon and infuriated. I'd build up walls of pure silence and ignorance to see whether they're going to break the wall and clean up the whole mess,when almost every time,it was me who started it all. It hurts to the core to actually stare at the mess you made,letting the innocent ones to beg for your forgiveness and still put your ego up when it shouldn't be like that. My ego is big but my love is bigger. I can get too emotional over such little things where I know I supposed not to that. Well I guess that not so little me. 

He's too good for me but in return I treat him like dirt. He even text me good night saying 'Good night syg. I love you so much. I hope tomorrow you wake up happily and you'll still love me like you did before.' even after a big argument which was particularly started by me. I know one word couldn't simply cover up the pain but still,I am sorry. 

I love you,muhammad hafizuddin bin mohd yusof. 

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